4 AM Forever: Marius Mathisrud

4 AM is the most spiritual hour of the day. When night dissolves into day. The magic hour. The liminoid phase of dreaming. For this project, we ask artists to set their alarm clock at 4 AM and create something covering their lucid dream state at that moment. Divine creations at the most ungodly hour. 4 AMEN.

Marius Mathisrud is a multidisciplinary artist from Norway who graduated at the KABK in 2017 and is currently based in Berlin. Through our ‘Get Published’ open call, Marius sent us a few glimpses of his work. It felt like a nightclub for your eyes, immersing in neon lights and diving into an imaginary bathtub of darkness. Hence why we asked Marius to set his alarm clock at 4 AM and asked him one question.

How did you feel when you were writing poetry at night?

I wrote a poem called ‘Snowflake’. It reminded me a lot of an earlier poem I made, which is now part of a longer film project I’m making together with Oscar Juul-Sørensen. I’ll attach both poems. Together with Oscar Juul-Sørensen and Thorsteinn Eyfjörd, we later turned ‘Snowflake’ into this track.

I usually make art late at night, and sometimes even after midnight –as with this poem. At night I always get the feeling of being very free, compared to the rest of the day. It’s definitely the time when I feel most liberated.  At 4 am, I felt very alone – in a good way for a long time. But suddenly, an extreme feeling of existential doubt came creeping in. That’s when I felt like writing, to get those voices in my head to go away. Maybe I’m not that special snowflake that I tell myself I am…

 

SNOWFLAKE (4 AM poem)

I FEEL SO VIBRANT

I FEEL SO FREE

IM UNIQE AND SPECIAL

LIKE EVERYONE WANTS ME TO BE

 

MY VERY OWN SNOWFLAKE

THATS WHO I AM

SOMEONE YOU HAVE NEVER SEEN BEFORE

 

I WANT EVERYONE TO SEE

HOW SPECIAL I MUST BE

A SNOWFLAKE THAT LOOKS LIKE ME

 

THATS WHO I WANT TO BE

 

BUT TIME PASS,

AND I’M IN NEED OF AFFECTION

I FEEL WEAK YET SPECIAL

TAKE CARE OF ME NOW LITTLE FRIEND

BEFORE IT’S TO LATE

PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME

 

FOLLOW ME DOWN THE RIVER

TO THE END OF THE UNIVERSE

LOVE AND AFFECTION

PLEASE DONT HURT ME

 

DONT HURT ME

 

MY TWINFLAKE

YOU AND ME

 

DONT HURT ME

DONT HURT ME

 

NO MORE

 

 

THE ONE I WILL DIE AS

I will go out

I will go alone

Alone, surrounded by voices that doesn’t mean a thing

Alone is where my voice is king                                        

I will not sleep      

I will go on till i find what i want

They cant hear me begging

They cant hear my scream

Reserection

In this institutionalised selection

 

Of values put before me

Without they taking into account what they ask of me

They cant hear me

They cant see the true me

The one i am

On the in-side

Of the walls that surrounds me

A skull of interpretation

My life is just a simulation

Of all my mistakes accumulates into one big erection

Reflection

Of myself

On the mirror of self election

Narcissus died in the lake

Im not

Im gonna stay awake

Not sleep

Never

I wont let them in

Into my mind

Cuz here I am the god

I am alone

In a world where me is the one

 

I wanna be

The one i dream of

The one people think of

The one i will die as

 

 

Poster from the film project

 

Wanna get featured too? You know the drill: send a lovenote with your work to thevoid@subbacultcha.nl